WHAT’S YOUR THIRD PLACE? Having your own middle ground

We spend a significant amount of our lives at work - around 90,000 hours, which equals about 13% of our lifespan if we live to 80. Home is another primary location where we naturally allocate much of our time. But what about other places? Where else do people devote significant portions of their lives?

Growing up, for example, my neighbourhood had a small gaming centre where boys would spend countless hours. For just a few coins, they could play video games together. They would gather there, spend a few hours, and then go outside to play on the streets. It was a place to meet new friends and socialize. This was before almost every home had its own computer or internet access. Such social settings are known as "third places". In sociology, a third place refers to a space distinct from our primary place - home, and our secondary place - work.

Examples of third places include churches, interest clubs, gaming hubs, cafes, libraries, gyms, parks, and theaters. Third places serve as vital social sanctuaries, promoting face-to-face interactions and community building. This role is particularly crucial in an era marked by a connectivity crisis due to the dominance of digital communication and the internet. In countries like Spain and Italy, the presence of third places is abundant; adults playing cards in the streets, and cafés serving as social hubs where people spend hours chatting, with food being secondary to social interaction. This highlights an essential aspect of society and mentality.

Some characteristics of third places:

• Socializing and conversation are the primary activities of a third place. It doesn't have to be the only activity; the general idea is that it can involve simple things like listening, playing board games, and engaging with others in a free and joyful manner.

• Third places should be open and easily accessible to everyone. This can range from free access to very low prices so that many people from different backgrounds can be around each other. They should also be welcoming and non-discriminatory, meaning they should provide for the needs of their guests on the same level.

• Third places do not place importance on a person's status in society, allowing its occupants to feel a sense of community. There are no prerequisites or requirements that could prevent acceptance or participation in a third place.

• Third places thrive on their regulars who contribute to the ambiance and neighborhood character. These regulars not only set the tone but also play a crucial role in welcoming newcomers and helping them feel part of the community. There's a unique comfort in being recognized when you enter your favorite coffee shop, greeted with a question like, “Your usual, frappuccino, right?”

• Third Place residents often experience the same feelings of warmth and belonging that they experience in their own homes. They feel that a part of themselves is rooted in the space, they are happy to spend time there, and they feel accepted.

  
  

One of the most significant benefits of third places is their positive impact on mental health and overall happiness. These spaces offer individuals opportunities to connect, share experiences, and find support outside of their homes and workplaces. By facilitating social interactions, third places help reduce feelings of isolation and loneliness, which are significant factors in mental health issues. Additionally, the sense of belonging and community that third places foster can lead to improved self-esteem and a stronger sense of identity. I emphasize community often because I genuinely believe in its power to enhance our lives. Community isn't just about being around people; it's about forming meaningful connections, finding support during challenging times, and working together to create an inclusive environment where everyone feels valued.

Looking forward, the future of third places appears promising as societies increasingly acknowledge their importance. However, in many countries, the prevalence of third places is declining due to economic conditions. Factors such as the rising cost of living, urbanization, and the convenience of home-based activities enabled by technology contribute to this decline. Addressing these challenges requires specific strategies, including developing accessible infrastructure, encouraging businesses to offer affordable services like coffee, and allocating funds for free public facilities such as libraries. Despite these challenges, I believe the benefits third places bring to society; including community connection, cultural exchange, and civic engagement far outweigh the demands they place on governments. Ensuring their continued presence and vitality will be crucial for fostering inclusive communities in the future.

What is your third place? As you reflect on this, consider your own third place. If you do not have one, I hope you feel inspired to find a third place that brings you joy, connection, and a sense of community.